What is a Tween?

A tween is generally defined as a child between the ages of 9 and 12 years old. This is based largely on a marketing demographic. These children are old enough to be considered independent thinkers and are a powerful purchasing group. Developmentally children at this age begin to see the duplicity in the world. With double digit age comes the realization that the world is not just black and white. They begin to experience that authority figures are not always right or all knowing. This is a time of transition into a fully independent person.

In today’s world these children spend the bulk of their time outside of school in a few ways:

• in organized activities
• connected to the world through media – internet, television, music
• alone – often choosing to separate from family

This increasingly programmed life leads to a sense of isolation. Their organized activities seldom include time for creative thinking or true relationship building. It is also at this time that non-familial voices speak louder to children. Peers, music, media, internet and advertising each seek to influence the individual.

So how does this all make tweens feel? Self-absorbed with the questions about their emerging individuality, curious as they learn more about the world and they see that there is a lot more to learn. They do not have control over many aspects of their life. Simultaneously they have gained power as a consumer block. Marketers know that as a group they have enormous amounts of cash at their disposal. Movies, television channels, magazines and the internet treat them as fully mature and responsible consumers. This mixture of influences can leave tweens feeling very confused and anxious.

So what does this mean to the church and what kind of ministry do we engage in----ministry that fills the need for SPIRIT in their lives.

• Support
• Purpose
• Identity
• Relationship
• Involvement
• Trust

Support as they engage in the world and struggle to find their personal identity. Bible stories of similar struggles help tweens reflect on how others have met the same challenge in relationship with their faith.

Purpose is just beginning to be important at this age. They tend to be rather idealistic and unrealistic about the possibilities for change. Nevertheless children can change the world in both large and small ways. Helping them to live into their power and passions is important. Providing them with guidance and encouragement without judgment can allow for amazing and transformational outcomes.

Identity at this age is multi-faceted. They seek to define their own identity, their identity in their peer group and their identity in their church family. Churches need to provide ministry that has programs that encourage all three different ways of being in relationship. Peer group classes that focus on the unique aspects of being a tween in today’s world should be the base programming. There also needs to be programs that engage family members as learners together. The last, but very important relationship that the church is in a unique position to facilitate is intergenerational relationships. There are not many places in a tween’s life where they can develop relationships with non-parental adults across the ages.

These relationships provide the foundation for meaningful involvement in faith exploration, service in the world and an active role in the life of the local congregation. When these program elements are present the tweens learn that they can trust the people around them and that they are respected and valued in the life of the church.

Along with these SPIRIT driven components there are other important components of a program that affect what is taught and how it is taught. These components are: story repetition, experience with the story, authentic connections with the teachers and personal ownership of the story.

The story needs to be told over several weeks so that the children have time to integrate it into their base knowledge. Hearing a story only once seldom holds power or allows for retention of the story. The goal of Christian education is not story knowledge so much as it is knowledge of the story that leads to transformations in life.

“Learning is experience. Everything else is just information.” This quote from Albert Einstein is key to designing an effective program. The stories need to be experienced. This means that the activities chosen must come out of the story not laid on top of it. No matter how cool an activity is, the children have to have an opportunity to learn why the activity is connected with the faith story. With out the why, the what becomes meaningless.

Adults need to be invited to participate based on their gifts and talents instead of just as warm bodies. This takes some work on the part of the Christian education team but it is well worth it. This kind of invitation become subversive adult education! Here is an example. A man volunteered to be the story teller when a congregation was learning about the Good Samaritan. His job was the demolition of old barns. He would purchase barns from farmers and then either dismantle them and sell the parts for mantel pieces or create picture frames or other artwork from the pieces. Occasionally he was commissioned to build custom homes from the old barns. What he did regularly was take an insurance liability and see value in it. Everyone in the story of the good Samaritan saw the beaten person as a liability, except of course the most unlikely person, the Samaritan. The storyteller saw a direct connection between what he does for a job and a biblical story. In a way he was able to tell that story from his first hand experience. Neither he nor the children who heard his story saw an old barn in the same way again. This was an authentic connection!

Personal ownership of the story means that the children have had enough time to know the story, they have experienced it in a meaningful way through an authentic connection with an adult and they are encouraged to ask questions about the value of the story in their lives.

• What does this story mean to me
• So what?
• If I know the “what” and “so what” of the story then – now what?

There must be time given to respond to the story with guidance and nurture. At this aged idealism is high. All things are possible through Christ! Their creative solutions to issues in the world can come out in response to the scriptures when given enough time to live into the text. Their response to the story can be shared with the broader church and both the children and adults are empowered to see the world through the eyes of faith.

This kind of education, filled with story and SPIRIT is the kind of education that has a greater potential to transform lives.

The Cornerstones program is specifically designed to help tweens explore and live into their faith at this time of great transition and development.

Return to Tweens Curriculum Order page.

 

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